The Longest Day of the Year

 
 
 


We celebrated the Summer Solstice by camping with Katie (Mark's sister), her husband Justin, and their 2 yo Adlen. Despite extreme temperatures, few trees, and crazy kids, we managed to have a good time. Unfortunately, Jaxon and I got strep throat while we were there, so we're hoping no one else will get it.
Saturday morning began at 5 am when the kids were up before the sun. All day we kept looking at the clock, "Is it really only 10 am?" etc. The evening went until we could no longer handle the children and put them in front of whatever media we could, ipod, dvd, books.
We did give our nephew Josh a quick call because he was baptized on Saturday (amazing that we had cell phone reception) but it wasn't too long before my phone battery died.
In the end it was fun, especially to see our kids play with Katie and Justin's dog, Buster. Jaxon had a great time fishing with his dad and even caught 6 little fish with his Spiderman fishing pole.
Although we were and are exhausted and still haven't unpacked the car, we are glad that we took this trip out of the 114 degree heat up to the cool (well cooler) high country.
There are more pics on my webalbum.

The Gift of Friendship

 I don't remember when I met Brittany. I think it was in junior high. She was a cheerleader (but, I didn't like them too much) and I think she wore glasses, but I'm not sure.
During the summer after junior high, Brittany was involved in a terrible car accident. She was the passenger and was seriously injured. Her face was really cut up from the windshield and she spent a fair amount of time in the hospital.

Our friendship blossomed during HS, where we shared crazy-hard AP classes and made trips to Dairy Queen when we should have been studying. Brittany had the best of both worlds, she was cute and popular, but also smart and down-to-earth. Even though she had it all, I still remember watching her squeeze small pieces of glass from the scars on her face years after her car accident. She never made a big deal about it, but I know it was a very traumatic event that was difficult to overcome.

Fast forward 2 years. The summer of 2000, Britt are friends from a distance, because she went to Ricks when I went to BYU. Still, we're delighted to find that we're both getting married, in the same temple, 2 weeks apart (in the same room!) She looks great on her wedding day, cute curly hair and a slightly tilted tiara (which I tried to 'fix,' much to her dismay.) She is so happy. She snagged a great guy, an engineer named Doug.

After that, we're both at BYU, Britt and I hang out with our husbands as newlywed couples to play Rook and learn how to be married. Before too long, Britt is pregnant. Savannah is born in November of 2001 and she has some difficulties. The diagnosis is Russell Silver Syndrome, a very rare congenital disorder. Savannah won't breastfeed or take a bottle, and her severe reflux means she has to be fed through a tube in her nose. When we were both at Wyview, Mark and I babysat Savannah once or twice. We learned a lot and really enjoyed her cute babyness (I also got prepped for my kids who had projectile vomiting.)

The next July, Jaxon was born and diagnosed with severe hemophilia. Brittany was one of the first people I called. She cried with me as we talked about our special kids. I remember how comforting it was to have a friend how knew first-hand the disappointment and fear that I felt.

The years have passed and we have both moved back to Arizona and have our second babies: Brittany had Mikenna in 2003 and I had Asher in 2006.

While she was pregnant with her third child and first boy, Britt was finishing up nursing school. She asked me to watch her girls while she did her last semester. So, her girls and my boys played a few times a week. I enjoyed watching them grow and play together. In March I found out I was pregnant with Finley just as Britt was in her 3rd trimester with Daxton. He was born May 31st 2007, just before she took and passed her nursing licensing test.

A year later, it's harder to get together as much because we have six kids between the two of us and Brittany works part-time at a hospital's NICU. We still get go on double dates or family picnics occasionally, but not as often as we'd like.

One week ago today, Brittany sent out an email that broke my heart.
While she and her husband were hiking back from a weekend at Havasupai, her 12 month old baby Daxton was killed in a household accident. Four hours later they came to the hospital to say goodbye to their little boy who just turned one. In the days that have followed, I have thought about her and her family, and how much I love them.
I visited Brittany and hugged her. She cried. I cried. I held her hand while she told me about the casket she'd just picked out, "It's so small," she wept.
But, I can't comfort her in the way that she comforted me nearly 6 years ago. I don't know how it feels to lose a child.

I just know how much it hurts to watch a friend I love lose her child.

It's terrible. Even now, exactly a week later, I don't feel better. The funeral was intense, but the highlight was when Brittany and Doug shared their memories of baby Daxton. Although the chapel was full of united sobs and sniffles, there was a spirit of hope and healing.

So, tonight I wanted to write about my friendship with Brittany. Our lives have been entwined, and strangely parallel. And although I don't know if I'll ever stop grieving for her loss, I know that I'll never stop being her friend. She's gone through so many difficult trials, and she always comes away stronger. Everybody needs a friend like that.

Ode to a Toad

We have three little toadlets
who love their Dad.
When he wrestles and tickles
they're happy and glad.

From dawn until dusk
These toadlets will beg
for a chance to be cuddled
or just hang on his leg.

Jaxon loves to play chess
Asher's happy to sing
And Finley's full of smiles
Doing any old thing

But the best part of all
Is the love that they share
Whether Dad's near or far
They always know that he cares

 
 
 

If my boys don't like ballroom, maybe this?

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Try JibJab Sendables!

Vinegar: My New Best Friend

So, a few years ago I bought this little book at the grocery check-out called "102 Ingenious Uses for Vinegar" or something like that. It reminded me of my grandma, who uses vinegar to wash windows.
Anyway, I stuffed it in a drawer when Mark made fun of it, but pulled it out tonight while trying to find our pool key. (we had a great FHE at the pool, btw).
While eating my banana-brownie split I flipped through this booklet and found an entry for unclogging drains. "Pour 1/2 cup baking soda then 1 cup vinegar into drain, wait till foaming stops, then rinse with hot water."
That helped my yucky kitchen drain run a little faster.
The next recipe was for speeding up slow drains. "Pour 1/2 cup salt followed by 2 cups boiling vinegar. Then rinse with hot and cold water. Hmm, I tried this one next. Unfortunately, the good work done by the first treatment was undone as the sink re-clogged filling with nasty water.
But, I thought it might be working slowly, so I waited, then got my plunger and voila! The best draining sink I have ever seen! Hooray!
This may seem like a small accomplishment, but I've tried a bottle of Draino, which is expensive and doesn't work, and is not "green." So, vinegar is my new best friend and I will keep my little booklet out and share my good news with everyone!

Home again, home again!

So I spent the weekend in the beautiful Colorado Rockies on a Mormon Feminist Retreat. (I blogged about it here.)



Even though it was nice to get away, it was certainly nice to come home.

I had my camera in my purse when I got to the car, so I snapped a few pictures of my sweet family, who was so excited to see me!

If you look closely, you will see that Jaxon lost another tooth, and we think he swallowed this one as well.


Mark had the kids for 2 days straight and did a wonderful job. The kitchen was clean and he even scrubbed our toilet (which is more than I do!)

I'm planning to travel the weekend of Father's Day, so I know that the kids will be fine while I'm out of town. (although Finley missed me most, I guess, and the breast pumping was a pain)

Still, I'm really lucky to have such a great children and a wonderful husband!

Happy Graduation, Cami!

This is our first attempt at a video and is in honor of Cami's graduation. Unfortunately the rain will prevent us from attending tonight (they are doing it indoors and only allowing 2 guests per graduate). But, we'll party hard with her on Monday and she knows we love her!


More super videos to come!
PS, thanks for the inspiration, Annie.

A few firsts

This week Jaxon learned to ride his bike without training wheels.
He talks to his bike and says, "Steady, boy, steady. . ."
And it listens to him, according to his report.
He's also had a few spills, but he's been ready to ride a "two-wheeler" for a while now, but since Mark never got around to it, I finally took matters into my own hands.
All he needed was a little push to get started then some instruction about starting while balancing the bike. He was a pro.


Little Fin has 2 new teeth! They came in within 2 days and on the day he had shots and I had no idea. He wasn't even fussy. This little guy is all smiles, all the time.
What a lucky mom I am. :)

Mother's Day (a week late)

Mother's Day was wonderful this year (as compared to last year when Mark was out of the country for 2 weeks)

This Mother's Day was a real treat. I woke up to Mark making breakfast with the kids' help and I quickly took the opportunity to jump in the shower so we wouldn't be late for church. Which is why, my breakfast ended up on the toilet.

It was supposed to be breakfast in bed, but I was in the shower, so it was breakfast in the bathroom, courtesy of Jaxon.
He didn't understand why it was funny that he put in the bathroom, but when I reminded him that he put it on the toilet, he did think it was funny.
And, the Egg McMuffin was delicious.

We had my mom and the rest of the fam over for dinner as well. It was a fun time and I got my mom a set of Miracle Blade knives for mother's day. (she's a fan of practical gifts and I got the same set for Christmas and I love them)

We had a nice time chatting and playing with the kids.

I've decided to forego uploading all of my favorite pics to the blog, but they are on our webalbum if you're interested.

Busy Weekend

First, while Jaxon was in the hospital, my mom turned 50!
WooHoo!
I was so happy for her. My siblings and I found a picture of her in her twenties and on the mat around it we wrote 50 things we love about her. I think she liked it.





On Saturday, Jaxon had a really loose tooth. He wouldn't let Mark pull it out, and when I came home from the store a few mintues later, I noticed it was gone.
He swallowed his first tooth! Poor kid. So, we wrote a note to the tooth fairy. She was very nice and left him a dollar under his pillow. (he calls it green money, to distinguish it from coins)





Here's a pic of me and Fin at my mom's birthday party. We celebrated it at the park by eating Subway and watching Asher let go of the balloons.











Asher and Finley chilling on the couch. Asher's into Cars (Lightening McQueen) and during dinner, I was playing music on my phone and one of the songs from the movie came on. He asked me to play it over and over, signing "more" and saying, "More Keen (for McQueen) It was pretty funny.

"Can we play pond again Daddy? I have plenty of time!"

Today, with the help of antibiotics, Jaxon is feeling better. His grandma stayed with him during the day so Mark and I could rest. When we came to relieve her, Jaxon was playing pool. He played with Mark, game after game and kept making these hilarious comments. People in the room were laughing and asked us where he gets his charisma. Mark answered, "It's because he's in his underwear." I guess Jaxon get's his sense of humor from Mark.
The diagnosis is a port infection and with luck we can get it cleared up with antibiotics. After a 10 day round we'll check for the bacteria again and then see if we need to take the port out surgically. If that were the case we'd have another one put in so that we don't have to do peripheral sticks just yet, as that would be pretty painful and traumatic for Jaxon. So far his hospital stay has been quite hospitable.Thanks for all of your thoughts and prayers.

Double Whammy

Saturday, the morning of the Salsa Challenge I had a sore throat. After talking all day to volunteers and the public at admissions, my throat really hurt. Sunday morning I woke up with laryngitis. (see post here)
My sweet sister, Tacy, picked Jaxon up from school and took him and Finley back to my mom's for a few hours, so I could get some rest. Then Mark picked up the boys on his way home from work at 4 PM. When Jaxon walked in the house holding an untouched sucker (his favorite candy), I knew something was wrong. He grabbed a 'throw-up bowl' and laid on the couch and promptly went to sleep. Mark said he had been shivering and trying to sleep on the way home. After a great deal of searching I found a thermometer that works and took his temperature under his arm. He didn't even move. 102.9. Uh-oh. He was really sick. And he had been fine at lunch. Weird. Because of his hemophilia treatment, Jaxon has a port-a-cath which is a central line to his heart. With this foreign device in his body, there is always a risk of infection, although we have avoided it for nearly 5 years (knock on wood).
The rule is that if either kid (both Jaxon and Asher have ports) gets a fever above 101.5 we have to take them to the ER in Phoenix as a precaution. So, we call our hemotologist nurse and she says to bring him right in. As we hang up with her, Jaxon sits up and vomits into his bowl. So, now we think he's got the flu (How am I supposed to battle that while I'm fighting this cold? Geez) but the nurse says to bring him in anyway.
Mark takes him and I stay with the little ones. I get a text message that his temp is 103. That's really high for Jaxon, the highest he's ever had. My family usually has ultra-low temps. Anyway, they take some blood samples and decide that he can go home, but they want to wait for a while to see if his temperature drops with Tylenol. Well, it doesn't. Jaxon wakes up to pee and is incoherent, can't answer questions and is just really out of it. So, they tell Mark he's going to have to stay the night. Yeah, so that's no fun. I really hope he's doing okay. It's always so sad to see my kids sick.
Anyway, keep us in your prayers.

Birth through 5 months

Finley will be 6 months on the 29th, so I've been going through pictures to see how he's changed from month to month.
The pics go:
Birth 1 mo
2 mo 3mo
4 mo 5 mo

I'm hoping to find some pics of my other kids that look like Fin and have a guessing game for my next post.

Easy Yummy Recipes

I'd like to post a few of my favorite easy recipes in hopes that some of you will share yours!
I also use mealsmatter.org for menu ideas, meal planning, and shopping list.

1. Hawaiian Chicken Sandwiches
Teriyaki marinated grilled chicken breasts, a slice of your favorite cheese, red onion, fresh spinach, and tomato with mayo on a toasted whole wheat bun. I copied this from Rumbi Grill. (The one in the picture is from Hardee's).


2. Swiss Steak
I made this one tonight. Super easy and my kids love it! (that's saying something)

2 lb Round or Chuck Steak
2 cans Tomato Soup

Cook in Crockpot for 4 hr on high (in the summer I plug my crockpot in on my back porch)

Serve with mashed potatoes and use the tomato sauce in crockpot as gravy.


3. Chicken Bryan (copycat from Carrabba's)

Chicken Breasts (one per person)
Sun-Dried Tomato Pesto
Goat Cheese

Coat chicken with olive oil and grill (I use chicken breasts/tenders frozen individually in a bag, and I cook them from frozen). I use a Foreman grill, but any kind will work.
Warm Sundried tomato pesto. Spread room temp goat cheese on grilled chicken, then top with pesto.
Carrabba's serves theirs with Garlic Mashed potatoes, or pasta. Yummy.

4. Multi-Purpose Shredded Beef/Pork
Got this recipe from a great caterer.

Any size, type roast
2-4 T Montreal Steak Seasoning
NO LIQUID

Cook in crockpot for a long time. Low 10 hrs, High 5-7 hrs. It is done when you put a fork in and twist and the meat falls apart.
Take it out and shred it with a fork. (I should be super easy to shred, if it's not, it's not done)
Stir it in a bowl and it should break apart even more.

Then you can do lots of things: add BBQ sauce (I like Bill Johnson's) for BBQ beef sandwiches, or add green chile sauce (the best is from Trader Joes) for burritos/enchiladas/taquitos. I'm sure there are more, but this is all I've tried. You can freeze the extra and it goes a long way.

My honey has a new blog.
Visit him and welcome him to the blogging world.

It started, or ended perhaps, with a thud. Screaming, I ran down the four stairs to the umbrella stroller, turned upside down on the tile with two fat legs sticking out from the bottom. Big brother had been pushing baby Fin around the house and wanted to take him down stairs, carefully, he said. Only it didn't happen that way. I just prayed that his skull wasn't fractured, and he didn't have bleeding on his brain. But, I reminded myself that this was the child without hemophilia. Whew. There's looking on the bright side.
At five months, our third son has endured more trauma than his older brothers combined. I should have expected as much. But, I did not expect to watch my baby's nose and lip swell to twice their normal size. Within a half hour I took him to the urgent care and he was seen two hours later and diagnosed with a broken nose. It will heal fine on it's own, I was told.
So, I arrive home, exhausted and still sick to my stomach to see my baby in pain and having difficulty breathing. My husband is glad to see us, but still furious at our five year old for pushing the baby down the stairs.
For some reason, I don't harbor the same feelings. When it happened, Jaxon was hysterical with grief. He understood how badly he had hurt his brother and was genuinely sorry for it.
Why, then, is his dad so mad?
Mark says it's because Jaxon was being disobedient during this incident. He was supposed to be eating dinner and had taken the baby for a stroll instead.
To me, letting that happen was the problem, not the disobedience. He's not yet accountable for his own sins. As parents, we're still the ones in charge and therefore responsible for the well-being of all of our children, even when they hurt each other.
Besides the accountability issue, I don't understand the benefit of remaining angry.
No one is better off for Mark's anger at Jaxon.
Not Mark, not Jaxon, not me, and certainly not Finley.

This traumatic event has helped me learn an important lesson, because I'm usually the one who holds grudges, especially against our impulsive 5 year old. Love really is the only way to help us change for the better. Staying angry causes more pain, for everyone.
And a broken nose is painful enough. Really.

Here are our family pics. Jaxon is 5 1/2, Asher is 2, and Finley is 5 months old.

He's so happy, and just starting to sleep through the night!

Asher was grumpy during the photo shoot. This was the best shot we got. Poor guy!

Silly Jaxon, always crazy during pictures, but this one came out pretty well. It's larger than life on our wall, though.

DeepThoughtsByJackHandey.com

I love these Deep Thoughts. Thanks to my friend Emily for showing me how to put them on my blog!

For Easter this year, the boys wore matching ties and Finley wore a cute baby blue outfit. But, I couldn't get them together for a picture, so I have three separate ones instead.
The best part of the day was after church when Mark gave the boys chocolate before he took off their Easter clothes. Yeah, Asher's tie still has chocolate on it.

Today's Photo Shoot.
Finley will be 5 months old on Saturday. I got a little trigger happy with the camera today and took him to my favorite place for photography, my bathtub in the afternoon. I get the best light in there.
We had a few smiles, but mostly he just looked around, and cried when I put him on his tummy, but I got a cute picture out of it anyway.
Having Finley around is like having a little piece of heaven. He reminds me about how wonderful it feels to have someone who is always excited to see me. Also, that giving and sharing love are reasons we're here on earth.
So, this is our little Twinkie. Just like the pastry, only sweeter.

On March 4th, Mark turned 30. His coworkers teased that he was over the hill, to which Mark responded, "That's an awfully small hill, isn't it?" (they're all in their 40s and 50s). In the morning, we brought him a muffin with a candle, and instead of waking him up by singing "Happy Birthday" as is our tradition, we surprised him getting out of the shower, which is why there aren't pictures of that special moment. :)
For lunch, the kids and I drove out to Phoenix and had a picnic at the lake behind Mark's building. His window over looks this area, and he spends all of his time watching the ducks (so tame, they almost ate out of our hands!) swimming around.
We had cake and presents that night. I was especially proud of the book I made for Mark. It's called "Thirty Years of Laughter, a Tribute to Mark Steed." I compiled memories (from many of you, thanks!) and photos of people who have known Mark over the years. If you didn't get a chance to add one, but would like to, feel free to add any memories as comments to this post.
He also scored a watch, cologne, a shirt and pants, a briefcase, and sunglasses (all for under $100). I totally spoiled him, but in a very thrifty way!
We had a great day and later in the week his mom came out to visit, so we had a family party then.
All in all, it was a pretty fun day. Not a bad way to turn 30. (if you ask me, but I guess I'm not 30 yet . . .)

Check out my post on Exponent II, called "How God Gets Through to Me: Lessons from my Children"