Our White Mouse (Sammy, the one revived by the vet) had 9 baby mice exactly 8 days ago.
Mark and the children have been very excited about it. The mother would occasionally take her day-0ld babies out of the nest and leave them around the cage (remember, she had brain damage). Mark would warm up a spoon and scoop them back into the nest.
Both parents have been kindly taking care of the mice babies and Jaxon is counting down the days until he can hold them. He shows them to everyone who comes over and talks about them constantly.
So, all our research suggests we not clean the cage for a few weeks or the mice parents could EAT their babies.
Thus, the smelly cage has not been cleaned for 2 weeks (nearly a week before she had the babies).
And, this morning I couldn't handle the smell in the boys' room, so I put the cage out on the back porch.
Mark had just hopped on a plane to NYC for a business trip, and the boys and I spent the day at my parents' house preparing for my sister's wedding open house. It went really well, except it was so hot today, nearly 95.
When I got back tonight at 8:30, I put the kids to bed then remembered to check on the mice.
They looked odd. All asleep, and rather oddly stiff.
Yes, they were dead.
DEAD!
Seven babies (two had died the first day or two) and the mom and dad.
I freaked out and called a friend over as a reinforcement. She watched as I cleaned out the cage, yes, I did accidentally drop one of the babies on the floor. It was really quite traumatic.
And, I'm so glad Jaxon can't read and doesn't know we have a blog.
So, I did talk to Mark briefly, and he sounds really upset with me. We discussed telling the children the truth, but I'd really rather tell them that I left the lid open and the mice escaped. Jaxon was already in tears tonight because he lost one of his new Bakugons at the open house (oh, and I was telling him about the Secret Garden, which we listened to on the way home). He sniffled himself to sleep.
This will break his heart and I have no idea what to do.
My BFF Leslie suggested that I not tell him before school, so I cleverly hid the cage in the garage, well in the van to be precise, because he might go in the garage in the morning.
Some suggestions I've heard:
Buy a new pet before he gets home: a puppy, a turtle, etc.
Make a funeral treat to take the edge off the bad news.
Any other ideas? What should I do?
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13 comments:
OH NO! That's so crazy. I have no idea what advice to give. A replacement pet would be nice. My sister's kids recently had a VERY hard time with death of their puppy, but once they got a new one... they had forgotten the original pet.
I wonder why the mice died. It was kind of hot today, but not THAT hot.
Puppies are a lot of work. I'd stick with something like a hamster. :)
I'm still traumatized by when our bunny daddy ate the bunny babies when i was probably 7 - at least he didn't see them all dead, that could be helpful...
Oh no! I don't know what to say either! I have no idea what would be better. Ooh, except don't let the kids think it was their fault. When my guinea pigs died when I was a kid, I totally thought it was my fault they died and the guilt about that was horrible.
If you're thinking of getting a rebound pet I would wait a few weeks to make sure that everybody is quite sure you want to be responsible for another living creature. Buying one before he gets home seems like a bad idea to me. This is something you want to sleep on for a few days at least.
On the plus side, at least a new pet won't have brain damage.
I also think that telling a lie in this situation wouldn't work too well. Jaxon is a smart dude and the lie will eventualy unravel and then you're faced with explaining the lie and I don't think that's a road you want to go down. Plus, I'm not sure that saying the mice ran away or were stolen or whatever is that much better than saying they died because the end result is the same -- no mice.
By process of elimination, I guess the truth is the way to go. But, like "the talk," only share as much as he needs to know.
Obviously he'll be upset, but figure out what exactly he's upset about. Is he worried it hurt when they died? Is he sad because he really wants a pet and now doesn't have one? I think he'll understand that you left them outside too long in the heat (which is the same reason you don't leave him in the car when you go to the store in the summer) and that you'll really sorry and that it's OK to be sad about this but they are in heaven now as a family and the mom doesn't have brain damage anymore and they'll be resurrected and Jaxon can play with them in the millenium, etc.
I would also have a burial ceremony and provide that closure. Like any good Mormon activity, there should be refreshments to take the edge off. Maybe some potato casserole, too.
(this advice is worth exactly what you paid for it.)
As one who lived through a cannibalistic gerbil ordeal as a youngster, I can reassure you that everything will be ok...I mean, no one had to to walk into the room and actually see the carnage first hand!
Count me among those favoring an upfront approach.
Thanks to everyone for your advice.
I will tell him the truth, and we will talk about another pet.
Kate, I'm glad you think it wasn't that hot. I agree, but obviously I was wrong.
I dumped the entire contents of the cage in the kitchen trash then tied it up and put it on the back porch, so I really don't want to dig through it for the mice carcasses.
Any ideas for some other way of burying them?
Can we "bury" the garbage bag in the dumpster?
Oh man, I am dreading this.
But thanks for your support. I'll let you know how it goes.
All died? That is strange. Poisoning? I'd ask a vet prior to getting another.
I agree with the other free advice — tell them. They will cry. Then they can get a new pet in a week or so.
Jennifer's hamster died two weeks after getting him. My sister had trained him and he got attached to her hamster. He also was waaaayyy older than we thought. We got a new one a couple weeks later and he lived 2 years. We knew he was dying and that's when we got the dog. HE died Sunday morning, just a we were leaving for church. We wrapped him in a piece of minke fabric. Then when we got home form church, we buried him in the backyard in a shoe box. She kept the blanket to remember him. (I washed it.) She made the headstone form a large rock and sharpies. Let her plan the funeral. If need be, call your Home Teacher since Mark is gone. Ask them who should speak. She still cries about it.
Sorry, skipped the paragraph about you baking them. We did that with a tortoise. Not on purpose, his shade fell over. He was malnourished form a previous owner. We told our son the truth. It comes up in conversation every once and a while. "You killed my tortoise." I don't recall him bringing it up since he's been home form his mission. It happened when he was 7 — so the accusations only last about 14 years.
I'm surprised you don't have to remove the male from the cage. My sister's gerbil ate her babies no matter what. It was disgusting.
I learned somewhere that it's good for our children to experience disapointments in life. Naturally as parents, we want to save them and make everything all better, but it's probably better to just let them feel the disapointment, then move on. We have a litter of puppies right now and two died at birth, so I showed them to Ethan and we talked about it, and he always tells people about how sad it was, you should bring your boys over to play with the pups! THey are leaving on Sat, it would be fun!
Hey, I'm way late, but I just wanted to say I'm sorry for the complicated situation.
I think the truth is a great idea. I think talking together and thinking about a new pet is a good idea. And planning for it and letting the anticipation build up. Getting a new pet can be so fun.
I guess the only thing where I don't think the truth has to be told is in the burial (I wouldn't go through the trash either). I think a shoebox funeral would be nice. You don't need to put the mice in there. Keep rubber bands on it. Allow everyone to say something nice about the mice, etc. etc., then bury the box.
My dad ran over my kitty with his car in our driveway in front of me. It doesn't get worse than that. THen he shoveled it up and threw it in the trash. When I freaked out more, he decided to do a funeral.
Tell them they escaped?
i just read all the other comments. so yeah, tell them the truth.
i also just read about kids finding out the truth about Santa CLaus and it was BAD....that's why I thought you should soften the blow.
Okay, I should totally comment on your blog more because it always amuses me. Plus, the comments are all the amusement I need for tonight! Man alive, do your friends have some sad animal stories! You can always bring up churchy things about how they're in heaven now. Good luck to you. This makes me even more happy that I'm not a fan of having pet rodents. I don't think our family will be ready for a pet for quite a while.
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